random porn customers… part 38 (porn protest)

At one point when I worked at the porn store, one of the churches in the area decided to protest our existence in their neighborhood.  Some church folks thought school students could walk by and see into the windows.

Now I suppose if anyone stuck their little noses against the glass, they could see in… in between the clothing displays that were put in the windows to block the view. But all they had for their viewing pleasure were greeting cards, lotions, and lingerie.  All the “good stuff” was behind another wall… like the big butt magazines, vibrating phallic bunnies, even the clown porn was behind that wall… away from prying eyes.

 

The church contacted the newspaper and there was an article written about the porn store. Guess what happened?  People saw that article and came in to check us out. A few new customers even told me that they didn’t know about us until they read the newspaper article. Score for us.

 

I guess the church talked about our sinful little store one day in the sermon, or adult Sunday school, or whatever forum it was that Sunday morning.  And after church…. more than a few people from the church came in to check us out.  I think they were trying to see how sinful we really were, but some of them actually bought stuff.

It just goes to show you that bad publicity can be good publicity… especially with anything vaguely sinful like a porn store.

4 Comments

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  1. Yeah, I guess in the right lighting conditions, a porn store could be seen as vaguely sinful. If you squint at it, maybe.

    But putting aside the whole societal premise about children’s fragile psyches, I think the last people the city zoning commission should consult about any retail locations are church congregations.

    I lived in Springfield, Missouri for 3 years (don’t ask), and for the first year, I bought my morning 6-packs of Miller High Life at the same convenience store. For some reason, I had the hardest time getting my buzz on that year, and thought maybe I’d finally built up an alcohol tolerance that I could no longer penetrate via my breakfast of choice.

    Then — a whole year later! — I discovered that in Springfield, if you sell liquor from a retail establishment within thirty feet of a church, the alcohol content cannot exceed 3%. I’d been drinking Utah beer for twelve months. Thanks, Assemblies of God! Are there any Presumably, there are Pentecostal guidelines about nipple content if you sell titty magazines from a nearby retail outlet.

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