random porn customers… part 41 (for a friend)

I read this on  PostSecret the other day… “Whenever I’m buying something embarassing… I buy a birthday card too”. This happened a lot at the porn store. What happened more though was the “I’m buying this for a friend” line.  Now I have to give some people the benefit of the doubt… a few customers were actually buying vibrators and dildos for their friends.  A few.  The rest? Of course they just told me that so they wouldn’t be embarassed.

Most of the time, the customers giving me the friend line were women buying their first vibrators.  First giveaway– They would be nervous even walking in the door. Second–  They wouldn’t let me help or even offer suggestions. Third– They would pay with cash, never check or credit card… (wouldn’t want any record of being at a porn store).  Fourth– They would give me the line a little rushed, “I’m-buying-this-for-a-friend.”

The line never bothered me… usually I found it amusing. It was especially amusing when an older man gave me that line once. Actually, he said he was buying the item for his wife, but he didn’t have on a wedding ring. He gave me some attitude, like a porn store was so beneath him. And what was he buying? An anal plug. I told him to be sure his wife used some extra lube with it.

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  1. My strategy is to bury my embarrassing purchase under a large inventory of other embarrassing purchases: “Let’s see — I’ll take this enema kit, some X-tra Small condoms, an issue of Menopause Weekly, a Prep-H two-pack, thisstringofanalbeads and a mint-flavored dental dam.”

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