When I worked at the porn store, Greg came in one time to check out the place.  He browsed the DVDs, but decided my store had too much boring porn.  Unfortunately for him, the store didn’t carry much specialty porn, like hardcore S & M, tranvestite porn, or butch lesbians with power tools.

Even though the store was underwhelming for him, Greg decided he wanted to buy a souvenir.  He came up to the register with a package of cock rings.  We got into a discussion about whether cock rings go over just the penis, or the whole cock-and-balls.  How they’re worn depends on what kinds of cock rings they are.  Either way, I told Greg the cock rings he picked would be too small for him.  He got all flustered, and told me he wanted that size. I kept telling him they wouldn’t work, but I rang them up anyway.

A couple of weeks later, Greg told me I was right… those cock rings were too small for him : )

*I thought this story about Greg would be a appropriate way to end the random porn customer stories since he was the one who got into this whole blog thing. I sure miss him.

It looks like the adult magazine Gallery is going out of business.  When I worked at the porn store, the Gallery Girl Next Door of the Year was from St. Joseph, Missouri.  She came to the store and signed magazine copies and topless photos of herself…  I bet her parents were so proud.

Lots of adult magazine companies are hurting now because so much free porn can be found on the internet.  But, when I worked at the porn store, magazines were still selling hand over fist.  Customers would page through the magazines, or pick them up and see which ones weighed the most so they could get the most for their money.  We also sold older issues in 3-packs, and customers would try to take them apart and put three of their favorite magazines together, or put a new magazine in the middle.  One guy would always ask for a trash bag to put his magazines in.  It turns out he rode the bus, and our white bags were see-through.  He didn’t want to get disapproving looks from any old ladies on the bus.

P.S. — This is my 49th random porn customer story. I’m porn customered out… I’ve told you most of my dirty stories, and I think the 50th will be my last one.